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Announcing Changes to Dream and Flourish Coaching

During this tumultuous year, at the ripe ol’ age of almost 50, I’ve learned the power and peace of BEing and living in my heart. It’s not an abstract concept anymore, but a deep in my heart, knowing. This feels like an intimate day to day relationship with the Divine (Call her/him what you may: Beloved, God, Buddha, Allah, Source, or the big current that flows deep).

This is the spot where is nothing to seek.

I know because I still go looking!

Living in my heart, the ultimate alchemy of heaven and earth, I’ve re-connected with several things that I really love!
*LOVE
*Elders
*Heart-felt conversations
*Community
*Creating a deeply grounded and enlightened space, as an ally, leader, or guide so that others can experience their own mix of heaven and earth. This still includes coaching, but a call to assist people who are dying and their families has emerged.

As I connect with what and how I want to integrate these loves into my life, Dream and Flourish Coaching isn’t fully resonating with my heart.

As of January 1st, I will put Dream and Flourish Coaching to rest.

In her stead, I’m launching

judykinney.com, “Living in the Heart of Live”

Which is about BEing: living through your heart, with real time grace and grit.

What will be different? I’m not completely sure, but I know I’ll support others to live through their heart as it relates to love, life, change, community, and conversations. I’ll be starting with what I know best: love and conversations.

I hope the changes I’m making provide you with even greater resource and support!

Meanwhile, I hope you are enjoying the best of holidays and are looking forward to 2010.

With much love and appreciation,

Judy

A Soft Belly = an Open Heart

Did you know that the way to our heart is through our bellies? You’ve heard this before as it relates to food, yes? At some point in your life whether you expressed it or not, you may have thought “feed me something really good to eat and I’ll love you forever.” I’m enjoying exploring that there is deeper wisdom in this sentiment than we may have believed.

Stephan and Ondrea Levine introduced me to the idea that our bellies are the doorway to living with an open or closed heart in their book, “Embracing the Beloved, Relationship as a Pathway of Awakening.”

We armor our hearts as we store pain, tension, and grief in our bellies.

You can get a sense of this quickly. Close your eyes, breathe in deeply, and allow yourself to notice your belly. Do you notice tension there? Tight muscles? Many of us will notice layers upon layers of tension to which we’ve become accustomed. Your belly hardens as you tense up in preparation to a perceived challenge. As you tense up, you restrict access to your heart and subsequently your full response to the situation before you.

Fitness Series Living the soft bellied life is as easy being aware and relaxing your stomach muscles and tissue. Yes, go ahead and let your belly soften like that of a baby, kitten or puppy. As you soften your belly, your heart opens to create room for the people, situations and events that make up your life.

I’ve been practicing a meditation to soften my belly and notice how I’m much more relaxed and confident. I stay much more centered even as events and challenges ebb and flow in and out of my life as usual. In fact, instead of tightening my muscles, I check in often throughout the day and purposely relax my belly. heart-in-hand

I use meditation to heal and release grief. You can do this by entering a relaxed state through deep breathing and a quiet focus on your belly. With each breath relax your muscles at deeper and deeper levels. I’ve also found it helpful to imagine the hand of god or the divine soothing tissues deep within your belly with love.

I know that suggesting that we go soft, especially in our bellies, is contrary to popular health messages. Of course it’s possible to have a flat and soft belly, as well as a big belly that is hardened. Since adopting this point of view though, I have a different perspective on my larger that I want it to be belly. I see my belly fat as both protection for hurts I’m carrying around AND a reminder to go soft, and possibly very little to do with eating ice cream.

However you go about it, here’s to living life with a soft belly and an open heart.

Between Point A and Point B is a Field…..I’ll Meet You There!

“Real revolutions don’t involve an orderly transition from point A to point B. Rather they go through long period of chaos before they reach point B. In that chaotic period old systems are broken long before new systems become stable.” ~Clay Shirky, Here Comes Everybody

Wow, we really are in revolutionary times, aren’t we? Your current point of view of this revolution may be personal or societal, but in one way or another we’re all living our lives in this middle zone between point A and B.

Because we’re used to going from point A to B in a mostly linear fashion, I want to share a few perspectives that I’ve found to be helpful while living in this transitory new ground.

First, with this much change, it’s easy to view our current experiences through a lens that was accurate last year, or even last month. When we’re using a familiar but outdated perspective, things can become blurred and confusing. A common reaction to this confusion is to internalize our experiences or blame others.

istock_000001921014xsmall Instead of personalizing your experience, acknowledge that we’re ALL, to some degree or another, in this open new field somewhere between point A and point B TOGETHER. I believe that the energy of this field is moving us towards streamlined transparency, community, personal integrity, and love. I like how Gregg Braden describes our common opportunity:

“We get to know ourselves in unfamiliar circumstances.”

Within my conversations with clients, friends, and myself, I keep referring to allowing this energy to strip us down to our beautifully perfect core. We’re not used to being this exposed, are we? While our initial instincts may be to cover up with more work, a safety blanket or life raft, I want to encourage you to keep allowing yourself to show up. YOU, are always plenty!

As you become more and more familiar with being in this middle field, you’ll recognize that we all have extra influence during this time of flux. We, by the mere act of being our powerfully core selves, GREATLY influence how point B and beyond will look and feel. Count me in!

friends I like Karen Bishop’s perspective:

We are in new and vast territory. It is up to us to create something new. When we connect to each other, we automatically go into a higher vibrating space, and miracles occur.

While you are in this middle field, I find it essential to know what grounds you physically and spiritually and practice this daily.

For me, this is time outdoors, walking or tending to my yard. Quiet time just for me and connections with others that is easy and enjoyable. Most importantly, having the big picture context of this transitory time keeps my grounded, light on my feet, and connected to my heart.

I’d love to explore this topic with you more!

How do these ideas connect with what you’re experiencing?

AND

What do you enjoy doing to connect fully to yourself?

Consecrate the Ordinary

I love special occasions that bring people together. Births, funerals, weddings, graduations, and special community events are great. Who can possibly over look our common humanity when we’re all brought together over something that matters to each of us.

I love it!

Yet, we spend most of our life doing the ordinary. Buying groceries, doing laundry, brushing our teeth, working, dealing with our kids and family. These are all the little things that give our life texture.

I’ve been wondering why we overlook the majority of our life.

What would happen if you consecrated the ordinary?

What if you recognized that, like the star athlete who devotes more time to practice than competing, the sacred and the magic truly lay in the mundane day to day parts of your life, not only in the extraordinary moments.

How would your day to day life shift?

How would the way you view special occasions change?

For many of you, I imagine that a small adjustment on your part will reap phenomenal joy. All that is required is a small step into the present babyandbutterfly moment.

Consecrating the ordinary is as simple as:

Enjoying the textures of your clothes when you take them out of the dryer or off the line.
Soaking in kids’ excitement as they play.
Listening to a friend’s worries and still reflecting their brilliance back to them.
Taking a walk and seeing how many birds you can hear.
Really tasting your lover’s lips, as if kissing them for the first time.
Smelling all the fragrances held within your food before taking a bite.
Filling and stretching your lungs as you hike, bike or do something physical.

Best of all, there’s nothing extra required of you!

beautifuloldwoman1 Relishing every day magic is yours as you:

Free yourself to be fully present.
Tap into your connection to all that is.
Know that all is well. (It always is)

And, because all is well, the only thing that needs your attention is honoring the moment before you.

Talk about healing and contagious energy!

What are your favorite ways to enjoy the extra special sacredness within each of your ordinary days?

(This post comes from my twice monthly ezine. A couple times a year I’ll share blog posts in my ezine and visa versa. You can sign up for my free ezine in the upper right hand corner of this page.)

Are you Taking the Adventurous, Direct or Scenic Route?

I find it very reassuring to believe that we are ALWAYS moving toward our desires. redblackguysladder4

Yes, always.

Our “job” is twofold: (1) keep clarifying what we want and (2) enjoy the journey.

I’m fond of saying, “Take any combination of the direct, scenic, or adventurous route. Regardless of your path, you’ll arrive.” Knowing that I’m moving toward my desires, whether I understand how at a particular moment brings me peace. Whether I’m happy, or exasperated, I know that I simply need to ask “how do I want to serve my purpose today?”

overwhelm4 Ok, sure, there are days when, with hand on my hip, I exclaim, “You’ve GOT to be KIDDING! How in the world does THIS take me toward my desires?!” I like letting myself be a bit dramatic….and I know that I’ll receive a quick answer to that question!

Look back over your life. Have there been times that felt like the worst moments of your life, but have led to today’s joy?

I’ve amended one of my favorite Martha Beck exercises to help you understand how you too, are also always creating your life.

Think about your life and pick one of your favorite things that you’re enjoying most.

Identify something good in the past that led to this favorite part of your life. (good thing 1)
Identify something good (good thing #2) in the past that led to good thing #1.
Now, identify something unpleasant/challenging/bad that led to good thing #2 happening.

on-parade3 Your path from the original unpleasant moment to a favorite part of your life today is clear now, yes?